What Makes A Long Distance Valentine's Day Worthwhile?

One of the suckiest parts of a long distance relationship has to be Valentine's Day, right? Everyone else is going out on phenomenal romantic dates while little old you is home, alone, victim of not only miles but the dreaded time difference too. I have to admit, it can be quite sad. I can't even go to Anti-Valentine's Day parties because mindblowingly, after twenty years, I'm no longer couple-hating and single. I was only ever the first one because I was the second one anyways.

Personally though, despite the fact that I'm in the UK and Taylor's in the US, I don't dread Valentine's Day. I don't dread any special occasion which comes along with her and me being a couple - anniversaries of the night we met, the anniversary of our first date (our anniversary in Alex Land), the anniversary of the day we became official (our anniversary in Taylor Land) or, indeed, Valentine's Day. In fact, I actively look forward to all of these, even though we've never spent any of them together.

This may be due to that I have nothing to compare my long distance Valentine's Days too. I am not ashamed to admit that I had never had a Valentine prior to Taylor. It fairly blew my mind when five months into our relationship, good old V-Day rolled around and I still had my beautiful girl by my side. Although the phrase I use is metaphorical rather than literal, this didn't crush my thrill to share such a special day with my new love.

This year will be our second Valentine's Day together. A part of me would love for us to be together in person on the day, but honestly, it's hard to listen to that part over every single atom in my body bouncing up and down and yelling with excitement that I'm actually, genuinely, real life spending another Valentine's Day with someone who I have honestly spent my whole life dreaming about meeting.

And besides, Valentine's Day for us isn't just one day. There's a lot more excitement to it than that. We have a couple of months build up. We have to plan and purchase each other's cards and presents ages in advance in order to send them to one another on time. There's the thrill of planning what we'll get each other, penning beautiful cards and the excitement of telling each other when the other's gift is all wrapped and ready. I always feel super proud and happy when I go to the post office and send a package to LA - it's like a little tangible connection to my girl.

After posting, we wait in turn for each other's package to arrive, and there's a feeling of Christmas, having your gift waiting for you for a couple of weeks while you wonder what it could be. On Valentine's Day, the same as on our anniversary or birthdays, Taylor and I will open our gifts to each other on skype and this is always a wonderful and special moment to share. It's thrilling to see the gift I bought Tay making her smile on the other side of the world.


I am so excited for next year, when Taylor and I will be able to spend Valentine's Day together, in person, and we'll be able to go out on a fun, romantic, swanky date together. But I'm also someone who does not believe in discounting the good things about the here and now. Valentine's Day is famously discounted for being a commercial, consumerist day. However, I wonder if the day is about more than that. While I'd love a glamorous dinner date, Valentine's Day for me is a day to celebrate something much more rare, special and irreplaceable.

For me, it's about that I have a partner who I've been with for over a year and I still love her more every day. I have a partner who makes my heart do backflips when I think about her and who makes me catch my breath when she walks in a room. I have a partner who I still can't quite believe is mine to call my Valentine, even though she's now my Valentine for the second time round. When I think about these things, it's hard to feel like I am lacking anything on earth.
 
 

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